Hoodoo Highway

Mile High Musings

Yes, I was in the Mile High City - or very close to it. I went last Friday and returned Wednesday afternoon. While it is great to travel and see old friends, it is always wonderful to come home and sleep in your own bed!! I missed Michael and Maya and it was good to get home to them.

The weather in Denver was HOT! However, it does help that it is not humid like it is here. Not sure what I would have done if it was hot and humid...just melted I guess. The other wonderful thing about the weather there is that it is always nice in the evening and at night. So sleeping was just fine.

I got to see some dear friends from my early teen years. I lived there from 1973 - 77, so I think it makes it ok for me to talk about Colorado, how it used to be and how it is now. I was told that since I did not live there I should not say anything about Colorado and I think "hmm, whatever happened to free speech".

I enjoyed Friday at the pool, swimming with the kids and visiting with Mrs. R. We had a wonderful dinner that night with a lovely family. The food was great, the fellowship of friends was outstanding and I miss those folks already!! They made me feel so welcome and accepted. I wish I could say that for the entire trip but I can't. Saturday I got to visit an Archiver's store in Highland Ranch. It was awesome!! My first time to visit an Archiver's store. I spent awhile scouring the aisles and taking in all the products. I spent less than $45 there. It was so great for my friend to take me there. We went to Whole Foods and got some stuff to make a veggie tray and dip for that night. I got some snack type foods and did not realize that the Chicken Salad I bought was $11.99 a pound!! It was good but I am not so certain that it was $11.99 a pound good.

Sat night we went to another friend's house for a "stitch and bitch". Of course, not much of either happened. Although we did get in lots of chatting and laughing. A couple of folks stitched a bit. I enjoyed it a lot and met some really neat ladies.

Sunday was ok. It did not start out well for me in the morning. I was personally attacked by the man of the family where I was staying. He hates that I do not believe (religiously) the way he believes. He resents that I will not attend his church when I am there. However, I am true to myself and mean no disrespect. I do not feel the way he does. Plain and simple. I am not saying his beliefs are wrong - but they are wrong for me. Mine are less complicated and less punitive, in my opinion. I wish that he would have respected that the way that I respect his right to believe in whatever manner he deems to. Along the way, I learned that he was also hating me for writing a blog entry two years ago about a similar trip to visit his wife and family. He felt I attacked him, his lifestyle, his home and Colorado. I did not. There was no attack at all and no malice on my part in any of the posting. I sent the link for them to read because I wanted to share it with them. I hardly think I was trying to attack him. In fact, he is not a motivator for any of my blog entries. Now, he "fears" I am visiting for fodder for blog entries and told his wife I was forbidden to write about them, her brother or anything about Colorado. Naaah, not gonna happen.
Remember that free speech thing? I still believe in the constitution and bill of rights and do not intend to let them be taken from me. Control your home and your family - let me worry about mine. Live and let live. A matter of respect - that is all. I was very hurt by his actions on this trip. I was even more astounded that his wife let it occur. I would not have allowed anyone to treat her disrespectfully in my home. Cest la vie'. It has bothered me tremendously. I really liked this guy - it is hard for me now but I do not want to dislike him. I always thought he was a neat guy (yeah I think he is a little uptight and a little worried about what others think of him but I liked him and we all have our hang ups right?). I think he is a good dad, good husband and a good provider to his family. I do not think his house is substandard and I do not think his lifestyle is bad. It is not my lifestyle but that does not make it bad. I embrace diversity, you can tell by my friends and associates. I love all types of people and relish learning things from all sorts of people. I am not afraid of someone who is different than me. I do not think hate is a family value. I do not think homosexuals are going to hell. I do, however, feel that those who presume to judge homosexuals and preach intolerance and hate are on a fast train to somewhere not so nice, should it exist. The bottom line to me is that judgement does not come from my family and church family or some preacher in a billion dollar empire - judgement comes from above - plain and simple. Who are you to judge another person? What gives you the right? Not your faith.

By the way, when I blog about faith issues, the government and such - it is not a personal attack on a sole person - it is the ideology of intolerance, religious bullying and such that I am opposing. Just for the record.

I was also questioned as to why I visited there? What was my agenda or purpose? Well duhhh color me stupid but I thought it was to visit a dear old friend that I love so much. I have been friends with her since I was 13 for crying out loud. I spend my money to go visit, spend money on her kids (whom I love dearly - they are all three great kids), oh and buy her a ticket to come visit here twice - yet my motives are questioned? How would that make you feel? It made me feel like shit. Plain and simple. Then it angered me to feel the "how dare they question my motives, who are they to think that my life evolves around blogging about them, one blog entry in 300 does not make you fodder for my blog!" - then I progressed to bewilderment again and now I am just sad about it all. I did offer to remove the "offensive" blog from two years ago. However, I cannot agree to never blog about them again. Pullleeeze. I blog about my life, my experiences and the people around me. It happens. It goes back to that whole free speech thing again. Ya know - we still have it although there are those who would like to say we do not. I will blog without malicious intent. I will blog the good, the bad, the ugly and such.

Another good thing about the trip was the time she and I went to dinner alone. We talked, laughed, cried, etc. We ate Greek food in Greektown (even though we were later told it was a bad part of town - it did not look so bad to me). We closed down the Greek restaurant. We shared lots of things that have not been shared before. We drove around our old stomping grounds and reminisced about our high school days there. We ended up at Waffle House and ate breakfast!! We rolled in after 2am. We had not been partying, dancing or clubbing.

I did get to visit another Archiver's on Tuesday in Aurora. It was even more awesome than the other one. Larger and well laid out. I would love to have one near me. Of course, I might spend more $$ than I would need to but it would be nice to have the choice!! We did a lot of Starbuck's visits.
We also did lunch at Pei Wei and I loved that. That is one of my favorite Asian places.

Overall, except for some sad moments, I had a great time. I am conflicted about some things but I know that I love my friend and her family. I know that I have never, ever done anything to hurt them. I know that I embrace them and keep in touch far more than they do. I know that I remember those kid's birthdays because I want to not because I have to. I know that I enjoyed our friendship all these years even though I believe with all my heart that I have had to work harder at keeping in touch than she has. I chalk it up to being busy with 3 kids, keeping records for business and all the family obligations. I hope I was right. I love her family (siblings, mom, etc..) and really enjoy visiting with them. For crying out loud, I have known them for 30 plus years!!!

In any event, Denver was fine. It was nice to be there and see how much more it has grown. NO, I do not think it is always a good thing for development after development to go into areas. You lose the land, the family farms and ranches, etc... that is not a personal attack on anyone living in a development - you have to live somewhere - it is more of a statement on society as a whole, we are so willing to expend all the land for the sake of progress. It sucks.

I have been playing a letter out over and over in my mind but cannot sit down to write it. Do I think it would do any good? Probably not, all of my motives have been questioned and there is always a curt reply about my intentions or motives. I am not given one iota of an open mind yet I try to keep an open mind about his intentions. I keep going back to that "Christian like behavior" model and it just was not there with me. Again, hate is not a family value. Rudeness it not a family value. Disrespect is not a family value. I apologize if anything I ever said or wrote hurt anyone in any way - that was not my intent but even so, if it was a perceived wrong - then I apologize. I mean that. I am big enough to apologize for my behavior (intentional or otherwise). I would love to see others step up to the plate and own their behavior.

As a final note, my seat mate back to Arkansas was a charming lady from NLR. She attends the First Pentecostal Church on the interstate. You know the really, really huge one. We had the most enjoyable 2 hour conversation about jobs, land for sale and her church. It was enjoyable because it was not accusatory, snippy or self righteous. She was humble and sweet. She even gave me the code to the sanctuary so I could go pray there anytime I wanted. I have a large Pentecostal section in my family so I am not unfamiliar with their religion. She even had me laughing about some of the rumors about that church. The one about them having ATMs in the church are not true. The one about you being required to show your W2 form and tithe 10% are not true. Yes, they have a HUGE church and Huge Education bldg/fellowship hall. There is a school there with 200 attendees. We exchanged cards and promised to keep in touch about a couple of things. That made the flight home so much better and eased my troubled mind somewhat. Amazing how a stranger with a message can sometimes be just what you needed.

Off to the day I go. I had a steroid shot for my shoulder/arm, which my doctor suspects might be a rotator cuff injury. If it does not help in a couple of weeks, off to the ortho doc I go. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers that it is not something that will require surgery. I was up at 3:30 and could not go back to sleep. So I am doing grocery shopping, house cleaning, laundry, the radio show at 3 and a hair cut at 5;15. We are off to Siloam Springs tomorrow for an open house at Mel & Todd's new house. We will come home on Sunday. Where does the time go?

posted by Deb @ 7:28 AM